I’m sitting here in my outdoor gear. Nauseated and not sure if I’m gonna shit myself @ given moment or not. I ate my bagel and chugged down my water & vitamin. I’m just sitting and waiting to spend money I don’t have on a cab so I can get to my doctors appointment. I’ve been outta the house, I got out on time but the good samaritan in me has set me behind. Stopped to help push out a man stuck in the snow (its a slushy mess out there). His walker was stuck. After I crossed the street to watch the bus pass me by and for whatever reason the convienience store was closed. Its never closed 😦 Now I am just chillin, with my shoes on. I’m dripping slush and ashphalt, exhaust fumes, brake dust and morning commute all over the floor and I’m ok with that. I just wanna go to my 10 Min appointment and tell the doctor what ails me so I can feel better about my suffering. I need to feel like I’m take’n care of me. I can’t help but feel that she is just gonna ask me what I’d like her to do for me. And I will say “I don’t know, fix me” and she will say let’s touch base in two weeks. And I will say ok and come home, go about my day. go about my day. go about my day. go home. go home. go home. repeat the cycle.
Hmm this cab is take’n it’s time. I hope they remember to call upon arrival.
When I get home (not sure how yet) I should immediately start prepping something to eat. I should also start the protein supplement I’ve picked up. I’ll talk about what I’m take’n this afternoon or this evening when I get back from my exit for the apartment viewing. By the way, lost another lbs over night, ugh I really need this to slow down. I ate pretty good yesterday I thought. Ugh where is this cab! I just called the doctors office to let them know I am running late. Lucky for me my appointment is actually for 10:20 Am so as of this moment I’m not late. I should call the cab service also and check to see if maybe the cab didn’t call and I missed it. Fuck I am stressed. I worry too much. And I ramble a lot. But legit this little writing session made me feel a tiny bit better. I’m just sitting here have’n a panic attack about a million things all @ once. The one thing I am looking forward to today is maybe get’n in a successful video blog post. I’ll need to shower I think when I get home, I skipped it this morning cause I pressed the snooze button one to many times. UGH where is this cab! Just called, he is supposed to be on the way and have arrived by 9:40 Am. They are putting out a recall. Maybe they can’t get down the street? Its pretty shitty weather out there. I’m gonna go and check out front. I’m out guys, wish me luck!