music to work by; …
My Music Monday was really a lazy mans post. I created it in hopes of amping myself up into some sort of creative mind storm. Well that never happened. Often I just picked something that was swimming in my playlist and tossed it like wet spaghetti onto the wall hoping it would stick. On a Monday.
What do I want “music to work by” looking like? Well, something like this;
Above; This is a doodle, I like to look at it as “work” … Ya see, I’m an Artist but I’ve been very, very veeerrryyy slow about production. Over the winter I came to a grinding halt. The above work is a self portrait, it is a portrait of where I work. And while I work, I listen to music. Music inspires me. It amps me up. Different types of music flow and sync up with my creative vibes. Aided by the right kinda sound I can work out an entire muralistic piece in a very short period of time. Without it, a single work can sit in my sketchbook untouched for weeks or months. Nothing demotivates me more than looking at something that could be amazing but never really makes it there cause I’m just not feeling it.
With that said, here we go. music to work by; Drake – 0 to 100
Stepping off the ferry into the Dartmouth terminal I briefly stand at the exit. Snow is pouring down, its beautiful. The pavement is dark, the street lights are dancing polka as the hush of headlights cast shadows over our towering parking lot mountain ranges of snow. The music plays and I’m stepping through the door. This anthem smashing on my brain… And “the radio waves are like snow“.
I’m gonna mix in a little recovery Day X with this post…
Its been a couple, nah maybe a few weeks since my last post. I really needed some time and space in more than one way. My social routine was becoming too routine and I’m being forced to make some changes.
My short lived relationship attempt really is a failure that I need to acknowledge. Not because it CAN’T work but because it SHOULDN’T work. I think we both see that and I don’t pressure her, she doesn’t indulge me… It just worked out that way. Not from a lack of trying though. We still have our friendship, with a little “time and space” it is something that will last a long time I hope. Can’t lie though, I already miss sharing the physical and intellectual landscape with another person so closely. Being alone is simple but somehow the adjustment feels so complicated.
I’ve found myself needing to withdraw from society a little. I get the warning signs. Anything and everything drives me to near homicidal madness. The person walking too slow on the sidewalk, the dirty and sickly fucker on the bus that can’t be bothered to shower. The one that snarfs down a litre of snot and spits on the bus floor. The circular ramblings of society about politics, religion, equality, sex (that no one is having)… Impatient egomaniacs that want to micromanage the world but take no responsibility for dropping the ball because obviously it could not have been their fault. But the fault of someone working under their guiding hand. The world tweaks my mind and I don’t like it. So I vacation from time to time, like everyone else but instead of going out into the world. I stay in and pass the time gluing my fractured mind back together.
I know that “time and unforeseen occurrences befall us all”. But there is nothing I feel more broken over these days then the crushing defeat of not meeting a goal. We are not talking by a few days or weeks either. I am talking Months. I have soo many goals it spans into my retirement and on into the afterlife. The problem is that I see one topple and well thats not soo bad but then another follows, and another. Before I know it goals and deadlines are pouring off the calendar like monsoon rains. Then even the simplest act of getting out of bed in the morning becomes a goal in itself. Showering, brushing my teeth. Leaving the house. I start from the ground up, struggling to just take care of myself let alone accomplishing anything of note.
Today was my first day back to work in over a week. I had to be human today. Thankfully my manager requires I look human while also performing my job tasks. I wake up, wash my face and brush my teeth. I smell good, trim my beard and fix my hair just so. And I wander out of my repair bay into the real world. Often I don’t like it at first, but I get used to it. By time I get off (literally and figuratively) I feel like maybe there is a little more fuel in the tank. I come home, and I write. After I write, I do. After this I will reevaluate, reorganize, re crunch the numbers, rebuild…
I hear this song Rick Springfield – Jessie’s Girl and think of this song…
“Director David Cronenberg stops for a photo at Canadian Film event”
Photo taken from thechronicalherald.ca, check out the source and the story. I picked this photo cause well this is the most badass photograph I’ve seen of Cronenberg in a long time. The shades, jacket. Brick wall and the look on his face of pure cool. Instantly this song screeched into my brain. This is the walk anthem for Cronenberg in this photo; They call me SPITFIRE!
walk it off
Particle beam courtesy of a snowy midnight…
The above photo is taken just off the shoreline of Alderney Landing in Dartmouth, NS. This is a sort of modern take on a lighthouse. Less the house part. A source of communication for the local ferry routes. Instantly made me think of this song. Enjoy!